I spent the first 11 years of my career following the prescribed path. Right out of college I became a teacher. I was a high achiever and quickly added more and more responsibilities beyond those required. Eventually, I moved into a district-level role, all while completing my Master’s and becoming a certified yoga teacher. 

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Externally, I was doing well. But internally, I was not okay.

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I was perceptive, growth-oriented and highly attuned to others, but I struggled to turn that same care and attention inward.

I was often ill, dealing with a vulnerable immune system tired from overwork. I oscillated between times of high productivity and times of absolute crash. I built systems to force myself to keep moving, even when my whole body was screaming for me to slow down. 

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I also began experiencing a persistent pain in my feet that I couldn’t explain or resolve. 

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I found myself waking up earlier and earlier, desperate to find enough space each morning for me to feel like I could start the day with some capacity. By the time I got home, that space was gone.

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No amount of optimizing myself was working, and I resigned to the reality that this was just the way life had to feel.

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In 2021, I traveled to Belize. When I stepped off the plane, my feet didn’t hurt for the first time since I could remember. It stopped me in my tracks. This moment made an opening for the realization that maybe it didn’t actually have to be this way. Maybe there was an option I hadn’t considered.

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Over the next few years I started to imagine an alternate reality where I didn’t constantly feel depleted. A reality where the demand of life didn’t overwhelm my capacity each day. I started letting go of responsibilities and making room to notice what I actually wanted.

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In December 2023, I felt a clear, intuitive knowing that it was time to go. That I needed to move to Belize for a year, a pivot I wouldn’t have been able to imagine just a few years before.

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Now, I am continuing to learn what it means to build a life that works for me. This looks like:

• Building a relationship with myself in the same ways I might build a relationship with someone else–noticing, supporting, checking in, speaking kindly, and extending compassion

• Intentionally moving slowly so that I can notice, acknowledge, affirm and express my own needs

• Waiting for an aligned “yes” before giving my time, attention, or energy

• Pausing in the moments before overwhelm to regulate and adjust when I can

• Incorporating small, space-building moments throughout my day

• Prioritizing larger moments of rest and active recovery to build more capacity 

• Staying connected to what matters now, and letting that shift over time

• Supporting myself, and allowing myself to be supported by others

• Responding to myself gently in moments of large emotions or overwhelm, knowing that shame doesn’t support recovery

• Returning to the tools and practices I already have when I feel low-resourced​

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Investing in myself in this way has shifted the entire foundation of my life. External demands rarely lessen naturally, and the consequences of operating beyond capacity are heavy to bear.

 

I would love to hold space for you as you explore what it could look like to create a life that works for you.